SWEET VIOLE(ts)NCE

"Serenity was the vessel where violence could be stored."

         Norman Mailer

         The Fight

Reggie thinks the boxing workout is violent.  I prefer to call it high intensity, or high impact.  Yeah, ok, it's violent, but it's somehow violent without being violent.  Even when I'm throwing all my mental and physical power into a punch it doesn't feel violent, because there's no rage.  I think that's the key, and it's going to be illuminating to see if there can be sparring - hitting another person - and have it not feel violent because the rage is not there.

Workout last week  - lots of punching.  These are the workouts I like best.  I like the cardio and conditioning because keeping up is a challenge.  Pushing it to, or near my max, but it's the punching that keeps me coming back.  It's that beautiful *SMACK* when the glove sounds against the bag, or shield, and for that split second you can see the punch connect, and feel the force move through your body to the bag, and back again.  A split second.  It's a shot of bliss.

HAIKU FOR COACH ARCARO

Heavy-bag workout

I snap a right like lightening

Bliss, laughter and bliss

Gloves and shield, throwing and catching punches, no rage, just form.  Intimate but apart - a form of service.  When we work gloves and shield I like to move in on my partner, give him or her an opportunity to hit harder and faster.   Sometimes I get backed against the ropes, and I feel like we're both getting somewhere.  It's focused and direct, straight-forward action, and maybe that's a reason it also seems devoid of violence.  I don't know, and more will be revealed.

And then, meditation class, and the end of suffering.  We worked in duos, dyads he called them.  The exercise was to ask, "Where are you feeling resistance in this moment?" and then trade off - two five-minute rounds.   Then the third and fourth rounds, "Where are you feeling release in this moment?"  The answers were about body parts, or emotions, or intellect.  Twenty minutes, in five minute trade offs.

At the end of it I felt totally released, with a wave of affection toward my partner.  I didn't expect either result.  I didn't expect anything.  We revealed very little to each other, but it was as intimate an exercise as I could imagine.  I asked, and she answered, and I had no opinions as to her answers.  She asked, I answered, and I had no opinions. 

No opinions, no attachment, no suffering.

Driving home I almost stopped to cry, but not sad, not happy, just human.

Just…human.

Human.